9:08 PM >> Something of Sadness

In a pocket to-do list I wrote: write something of sadness. Something of sadness. Admist all that I reminded myself to go to the dry cleaners and to research some sea shanty from a book that I am reading. So that I will remember, the shanty is titled "The Prickle-eyed Bush".

So what. What is there of sadness that I have at the moment. I am sad, I suppose. There are things in life that I wish I'd have accomplished as of yet, yet I haven't. Namely, a female to share this all with. Though what female out there would put up with a fella like me. I don't know. That's prolly a stretch. There are other things more attainable maybe. For instance, some direction. I am 27 and without work, by choice. I quit my job of five years a couple of months ago. During the days I drink coffee, check the Internet, wait for lunch, then dinner, the for my first beer of the evening, and then the cycle starts again. It is endless. Some days I'll see a movie. Some days I'll go on a temporary vacation. But. It is this endless cycle of loneliness. I think I may be talking to myself. Haven't I always done that though. I don't know. I don't know. Now I am repeating myself. Is there no one here to edit my thoughts. I suppose not.

OK, there are two paintings I intend to paint as soon as the inspiration passes. They are, as my pocket notes describe: Miller and Ravenous. Miller I know is a painting of a Miller High Life can of beer based on a late-night conversation that Ben and I had. Ravenous--I forget. I cannot remember what the painting is ...ah yes, It just came to me. I am going to get blitzed in some fashion, put on the Ravenous soundtrack and begin painting. We'll together see what the outcome is. Together. Yada yada yada